uncertainty reduction

in class we have discussed how to basically reduce awkward moments in our relationships. i think this helps a lot in managing our relationships more actively than just going with the flow. most people tend to just go with what they see in front of them, not knowing how to handle every relationship in every single point of contact. another important point regarding relationships also mentioned was the social exchange theory where people passively or actively seek rewards from relationships. no matter how religious any one can be and believe the prayer for generosity of st Ignatius "do no count the cost," at some point, you will count the cost. managing and maintaining relationships isn't an easy task, nor is it cheap. time and money are essential tools to handling and managing relationships for practical reasons.

Cognitive Dissonance in women :) (free observation)

ah yes, the infamous cognitive dissonance. i finally got the chance to talk about you. the very idea that keeps people in line, and a bit insane. I would not want to sound very misogynistic but I notice this more with girls than with boys. More often that not, men are not conformists. They have  their own thing and they prefer to keep to themselves. Women, however, choose to be more "in" than men. As what my girl friend told me, girls do not dress to impress guys, but to impress other girls. Well, true enough, men won't think about what girls are wearing as we have no idea about style or anything; but other girls will. Thus this becomes an avenue for subtle psychological cat fights. Girls who do not really dress flashy, start doing so  because of the influences of other girls around them. This is not particular only in clothing. Girls can be confusing when asked what they want, especially in relationships. This has been one of the main reasons why my girl friend and I have fights sometimes. although, I do not solely blame her if we have fights. it's just that, it's hard to decode what she wants/needs in time before the fight goes way out of hand. i guess this is where the guy's patience and understanding is really tested.

on ranting and kinesics

it's really annoying how emails and passwords screw up on times when you need them most. I'm submitting this blog late because i couldn't access both my gmail and blog yesterday due to security failures and what not. zzzz. you can just imagine how much ive been cursing google, making "tsk" sounds in annoyance, slapping my bed, and to the extreme -- punching the wall. now that I'm typing this blog about kinesics, I just realized what I've been doing last night involved this topic. Through rage and irritation, i was able to express and release my anger in different ways. first, because i was alone in my room trying to fix this problem, i had no one to talk to so instead of shouting crazily, i just kept making the "tsk" sound. second, as much as i really wanted to punch the people who manages google for doing a bad job at a bad time, i just slapped my bed as a form of release because, well, i have no choice. hahaha. the way i see kinesics, they are better ways of releasing emotions, may they be positively driven or not. the solidarity of release through kinesics makes one sane even in times of rage and anxiety.

aristotle's theory

Aristotle's Ars Rhetorica is the earliest document that we can refer to when talking about communication. In his article, he expounded his observations on how we communicate as human beings. Thus, we are given the model of the Speaker -> Message -> Audience. He, however, gave more emphasis on the speaker in doing the communication. According to Aristotle, the Speaker plays the major role in relaying his message, regardless of how the audience perceives it.
I agree with Aristotle even in the face of new schools of thought or modern views regarding communication. For me, it really is up to the speaker to make his message appealing. First of all, his topic must be relevant and interesting; this obviously is his job, not the audience's. Second, in order for his message or arguments be heard, he must be able to speak convincingly to his audience by sounding confident and with conviction; again, this is the job of the speaker, not the audience's. Lastly, the speaker's relationship with the audience will be much more meaningful if the speaker is able to make the non interested be interested rather than make the interested... well, not interested. Everything really is just about the speaker, and the audience is just there to listen and learn from the speaker.